Home and Homesick

Dearest,

It was midnight and sleep was not yet here to bother. It was quiet and cold here and it’s the second day of my short vacation. Not an interesting day and it’ll never be since I was supposed to rest, literally. The rain fell heavy this afternoon compared to yesterday that without a second thought I went out of the old house and soaked.

With each drop pouring on my face and everywhere, things began to blur. I try to remember a place – the trees, the road, the houses, the watered soil – they were still the same with what I have in my memory more than ten years ago. Everyone running. Everyone’s noices. Everyone’s laugh. Everyone who doesn’t believe in “Rain, rain, Go Away” nursery rhyme. Today, no one was running, and not a single voice heard. I began to feel colder and colder and so I run towards my grandparent’s old house, hoping that after running I might feel a little less cold. I remember, we used to shower on the broken gutter at the side of their house. And every time my grandmother sees us, she would yell at us getting sick. Of course she’s just worried, but we would always run away and look for another broken gutter-shower. Today, I heard no yelling and the gutter was still broken. I am home and homesick.

After leaving for school seven years ago, I thought all that I left would welcome me when I get back. That everything can be preserved. It wasn’t that way. Everything has to go away. Every time I get back here, I am looking forward to a feeling connected to the past, which I know is impossible. The best things I have here is my childhood and I know it was over. I was just hoping.

In the near future, I will surely feel the same when I get back to a place I know I belong. It’s like a train station where you meet everyone and the one seating beside you is your best friend. Then one by one, they’ll be gone to each of their own station, way to their own journey.

Today, I will consider this place as the foundation station.

I felt colder and decided to dress up.

Cheers!
Rav